I found myself tonight reflecting on the intensity of Jesus' love for his bride - the church. I wondered whether I could possibly dig further and understand the depth of His love for us who comprise the church - his bride. It may not be easy to understand but I don't give up easily... I want to know... for knowing is loving and loving is living with...
I went to see Him in the chapel before I finally retire for the night, there at the foot of the cross silently I sat and listened to Him. The light was out, it was just Him and me - the Bridegroom and His friend.
Silence, only a light from a little candle was watching us as we talked...
After an hour of stillness, there was no answer from Him whom I love...
Inside my room as I laid my back in bed, and as I stared on the ceiling quietly, the Liturgy of the Hour Hymn "Roman VIII" came back from memory...
For to those who love God,
who are called in His plan,everything works out for good.
And God himself calls them to bear the likeness of His Son
That He might be the first of many many brothers. (Rm 8:29)
"To be the likeness of His Son..."
I closed my eyes and prayed for rest of body and mind, allowing Him to
penetrate my spirit and immerse me in His presence.
With my eyes closed, I saw the image of the vigil light at the sanctuary, the sole witness of my one hour conversation with Jesus. "There", next to the Beloved faithfully lit and watching tirelessly, "there" just like one of the seven wise virgins, this light is in vigil for the coming of the Bridegroom. Suddenly I realized, "the Lord is responding... He is sending me His message."
"In the quietness of your heart, there I will speak to you.." (cf. John 16:4)
"How intense is My love, you are asking Me?" It is,
- "intense enough to remain alive and warm from the time I was nailed on the Cross, until tonight as I embraced you with my presence".
- "intense enough to carry for you the Cross that unites us in love and for Love
- "intense enough to patiently wait for you day and night for the day that you will come Home"
- "See the vigil candle next to Me at the sanctuary, My faithful companion day and night. Without a word but a presence. That is how much you mean to Me- silently I give you My light to accompany your journey 'til you find your way back to Me. It doesn't matter how long... I will wait for you. Love hopes...
I remembered you...
You are the "vigil light", one of the wise virgins that is and will be lit "pour toujours" watching tirelessly and in vigil a faithful companion of the Beloved.
"May my incense offering be as bright as your light for the Beloved.
You are a presence that will remain in me, always."
Then I seemed to hear Him whom we love said,
"and you, do you love Me as much?"
I replied,"Lord you know everything, you know that I love you...Not my will but Thine."
Only then that He put my spirit to rest....